Jill Vs The Noobs

JILL GOLICK points out the thing that doesn't often get talked about in Canada; but should give pause to new writers looking to get their start.

Two More Sleeps

Mmmmm.

I still think I'm gonna miss Doakes. But this sure looks ... yummy.

Random Humbling Moment #478

SO IN THE last couple days, we were out on location shoots. And they were tough days. High scene counts, far out in the city, with busy streets that needed to be blocked off or traffic stopped in two minute increments. And there was rain. And bugs. And the fact that we were up against it, much of the day.

I've seen it a few times now. You look at your watch about six hours into the day and think, "we. are. screwed." Visions of having the plug pulled on you at two hours overtime keep you awake and terrified.

And then, slowly but surely, the crew catches up. They hustle a little more. Lighting that was going to take twenty minutes takes ten. The blocking goes quicker. Grips run. Electrics swear and reset mightily. The AD calls for finals and they're already done.

And all of this is done while they're getting more tired.

And you make your day.

It's a pretty impressive thing to see.

And one more random fact: unlike Toronto, where everyone's dire and shot out -- when you shoot on a residential street in Unionville -- the neighbours come out at the end of the day and bring you home baked cookies.

I kid you not.

Thanks, Maple Drive, and Unionville, and the hardworking crew of The Border, now up at Sheridan College, doing what they do. Episode 204, "Nothing to Declare," is wrapped.

The Director, Michael DeCarlo, is on a plane to Calgary, ready to start work on "The Wild Roses," after leaving behind some very classy calling cards. See you in September, Michael. Guest actors Matt Deslippe, Reagan Pasternak, Tamara Bernier Evans, Marie Ward, and Bruce Hunter made me laugh on every take. It seems like a thousand years since we started with David Fox in a former bar on Dundas, even though it was only about 10 days ago. It can be a great lot 'o fun, makin a fun little TV show.

But now, I'm back riding a desk where I belong.

P.S.A. Service To Writers: Clam Bake '08

THERE NOW, my brothers and sisters. My kingdom for some calamine lotion. Those skeeters sure can bite. Today the writer returns to his natural habitat - the warren like office with the Herman Miller chair. Oh how the forest creatures will dance and the mosquitos weep for the loss of so tasty a price.

They can suck it.

If you notice the results of the poll at left, you may note that "Did I say that out loud?" won handily in our poll of the worst clams in movies and tv, with a dominant 40% of poll respondents choosing it over such worthy contenders as "I'm getting too old for this shit," and "I have a bad feeling about this," which tied with 27%. No doubt some of that had to do with the always TV quotable Jaime Weinman weighing in and agitating for a big smackdown against DISTOL?.

Well, Weinman, you got what you wanted. But oh, the price, the price -- because by messing with the forces of nature, you might have something to do with the comparitively minty-fresh score of "Well, that happened," which only annoyed 3% of poll takers.

Writers: "Well, that happened" is still viable. Insert this ironic aside into your scripts immediately via the smart, ironic, funny sidekick with all deliberate speed.

See what you did? Damn you, Weinman!

Actually, I find the concept of the clam to be endlessly fascinating on a wonk/geek writer level. It's right up there with the provenance of slang -- why some slang words and phrases remain evergreen, [see: cool] while others date horribly [vis: rad, homeboy, "let me rap with you,"], others never really break out of their regional usage [chesterfield, bollocks, wicked] and still others wind up, hilariously coming out of the mouths of U.S. presidents. [See W.'s sad romance of the awesome.]

But back to clams. It strikes me that we haven't talked about that for a while, so I'd like to throw that open to the madding crowd. What's the most egregious clam that's out there right now? Now, now -- let's stay on point here, chilluns. I'm not talking story or visual stuff here. Let's keep it strictly on the dialogue-low. Things people say in TV and films that are supposed to be jokes, but that have become so shopworn as to be utter hackery. Go to town.

BTW, I think the whole clammy clam debate really should have been cured by the internet. I remember with glee being on Charlie Jade and being in South Africa and wondering if the dialogue phrase I was putting in was too stock, too cheap. Enter Google-in-quotes, and you see the page count with that exact phrase? Instant perspective my friends. Instant perspective.

Do Not Adjust Your Blog

WELL WELL, so many riches. The WGC contract extension passed -- which is good news for all Canadian writers. Flashpoint is on the move to Thursday, which is probably good move for that show, and the pilot to Pretty Handsome is probably the best thing I've seen since the pilot to Breaking Bad. But all that has to wait as I'm on the road to Mimico. Day 7 of 7.

Normal scribbling resumes tomorrow.

Freelancers, really? Part Three

IN PART ONE and TWO of this post, I went into the value of having a writing class in the Canadian Film and TV industry that can make a living on writing full time, and the economic and creative difficulty of "mandating" a couple of scripts per season for freelancers.

In rereading this discussion in preparation for this final post, I was struck by something new that came to me out of the comments. There were a few "freelance" writers who seemed to get a bit huffy because they thought I was calling them "part time writers." Of course, that wasn't my intent. A full time freelancer who puts together a living from many different sources during a year is, of course, a full time freelance writer. And in the sense that a writer in a story department isn't an employee, but an independent contractor hired for the length of the project, well, hell, they're full time freelancers too. It's just a difference in how you get to the point of making your year.

What we have here is a culture clash. The levers of how story departments work in Canada and how scripts are used to top up anemic salaries means that writers will always scramble for their scripts. So what we have here is a difference of opinion between those who look to staff and work on one project for a few months, and freelance freelancers (hoo boy) who want maximum freedom but access to a pool of greater opportunity.

That's a fundamentally unstable proposition. Neither method is better than the other. Both have advantages and disadvantages. There's just no way to please both groups through the mandating of one or two scripts for a freelancer each season. Whatever you decide to do, one group loses out.

It seems to me that the people who would most like there to be a "mandated freelance script rule" fall into three main categories:

1. Baby Writers who think it will make getting that first break easier.
2. Working, Full Time Freelancers who want the option of the occasional script as well as the freedom to work on their theatre, screenplay, print, or prose projects.
3. True part-time writers, who make the bulk of their money doing something else (acting, producing, crew, etc.)

Is there a way that we could improve the opportunities for these three groups without instituting the mandated freelance script, which would hurt people who mostly try and staff?

Let's take on the Baby Writers first. Guys, Girls, this may not be a thing you want to hear, but here goes:

Things are pretty good for you already.

If you have any talent whatsoever, you may not realize it but the Canadian system is already set up in such a way that it's considerably easier to break in here than it is in the USA. First of all, you have places like the CFC and NSI who are turning out grads each year, pre-vetted, that for some reason are a particularly flavorful fish for Canadian Broadcast Execs. You do have wet-behind-the-ears grads getting development deals all the time. I don't think that's always the best deal for the industry, but that's another subject for another time.

Add to that the fact that many series do look for a junior to put on staff when they're ready to go, for a very good reason: you're cheap. It all comes down to money. They can hire two or three of you for what they'd have to pay me. So there's that.

Then there's the regional nature of Canadian TV production. We have wonderful provincial barriers in this country, straining and groaning to make those tax credits work. If you are a writer from NFLD, or Alberta, or Saskatchewan or Manitoba -- heck, buddy, you may have just won the lottery. There are diversity programs you can take advantage of, if you're from a background that qualifies.

There's also the opportunity to get in at the story-coordinator level, helping a story department. You might even be thrown a co-write. Yup. Provided you actually can write, a little legwork on your part, a bit of bustle in the hedgerow, and you can truly make your own luck. But it really is on you. You have to figure it out. The movement you need is on your shoulder.

The problem isn't in the starting out -- it's the few years down the road when you're not the new thing anymore. When you have a bit of experience and some expectation. Then it gets dicey.

For groups 2 and 3 above, there are things that would make it better.

• We could try to pursue a course where we set minimums or try to raise the salaries for story editors. If the weeklies were higher, then maybe there wouldn't be such a scramble for scripts. But then again, they might hire fewer story editors. The pressure might go back to making everything freelance, with one harried overworked "head writer" having to cobble it all together. That's a sure right to quality. Sigh.
  
  
  
• We could try to take a stand against "writer sweatshops." Monitor shops that hire lots of writers to endlessly come up with story that then has to make it past a non-writing producer, all for a weekly and no script guarantee. The largely unregulated nature of this side of the business is kind of a bit of a scandal, and nobody's talking about it. Agents and business representatives have a role to play in this, too. Many Canadian agents are playing fast and loose and close to the vest when it comes to communication with the WGC. If the guild doesn't know about it, they can't do anything about it. There's a cozyness to producers out there that might not be serving clients exceedingly well.
  
  
• We could develop modes of conduct, education and outreach to people who will be running story departments, or network executives or producers, about the values of thinking about that outside person and what they can bring to the table.

As for all the things that a freelancer can bring to the table, I've often thought that what might be wise in a story department in Canada was to split or stagger contracts. A new director coming into the set can bring new energy. Why not codify that with writers, too?

What if we structured some story departments so that one writer, say, had their work frontloaded, and didn't work the whole season. And another writer came in later and started halfway through, thereby bringing new energy and torque to a show? I think that kind of worked pretty well for Blood Ties, where I joined halfway through the run. Maybe that's something that could be encouraged?

Imagine if, just as you're all getting tired, there's a new infusion of energy? That seems to me to offer the best of all worlds -- getting someone new in to bring fresh ideas and energy, and yet providing the continuity one needs to have a unified vision in the story department.

Anyway, that's what I think. What about you?

Is It Wrong?

THAT I FIND myself wanting to impress Bad Horse?


Probably not a good sign, right?


Whatever.